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jin insani shakal main sharab pene baar par gaya 
9 pag pene k baad dokandar ne us se aa kar pocha 
oe teno charh di nai sharab
jin*ha ha ha ha ha main jin hoon
dokandar * lo g charh gai kanjar no

Pathan........ jab garmi lagti hai to mai AC ke ssmne
ja kar beth jaata hoon..

Man......... aur agar phir bhi garmi khatam na ho to 
phir kiya karte hain..

Pathan....... To phir mai AC on kar deta hoon

Khofnaak andheri raat k sannatay main
ek bhoot dosray bhoot ko samjhra raha tha:
bhai ghabra mat, ye sub tere dimagh ka waham hai,
pathan wathan kuch nahin hote.

Wife:What is 10 years with me?
Husband:A second.

Wife:What is $1000 for me?
Husband:A coin.

Wife: Ok give me a coin.
Husband:Wait a second

2 choohe paid pe baithy thy nechy se ek haathi guzra
ek chooha hathi py ja gira.



dosra chooha bola,

daba k rakh saalay ko, mein bhi aata hu...

Jab paper ho out of control toh answer sheet ko kar ke fold
Answer sheet ko kar ke fold aeroplane bana ke bol

AAAAAAL WILLLLL FAIL!!!!!!!!!!

Student kya jaane ke rezult kya hoga??
Marks milein ge ya phir andaa hoga??
To girl friend ghuma, paisa ura..
Paisa ura ke bol
Papa ALL IZ WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girl-Nice Mobile.

Where Did U Buy?


Boy-I Won Dis In A Running Race.


Girl-How Many People Participated?


Boy- MOBILE OWNER, POLICE And ME.

An Indian & an american met on a plane & had a bet Dat if Indian fails 2 ans his questns he mst gve $5 & if american fails he has 2 gv $500..

American: whats the diffrnce b/w earth n moon..?

Indian silently gives 5$..

Indian: which is the animal wid 3legs, goes 2 da mountain & retrns wd 4 legs..?

The american searches 4 2hrs in laptop & gv $500..

n asks..

Wats d ans..?

Indian again silently gav $5!

Husband:- Aaj kiaa pakana hay???

Wife:- Jo Aap Kehain

Husband:- Acha chawal (rice) bana lu

Wife:- Abhi kal tu pakaye thay kuch Aur batain

Husband:- Acha Sabzi bana lu

Wife:- Ufffffoooo bachay naheen khatay

Husband:- Achaa Qeema Bana Lu

Wife:- ish, Mujhay Allergy hay

Husband:- Acha Paratha Bana lu

Wife:- Raat ko paratha kon khata hay

Husband:- Phir kiaa pakanaa hay??

Wife:- Jo Aap Kehain

Day : 1 Samandr key Kinarey... Aik Larka aur Aik Larki.  

Day : 2 Wohi Larka.... Doosri Lakri.

Day : 3 Wohi Larka.... Teesri Larki.Hence, prove dat: Larkay kabi nhi badaltey... Larkiyan badel jati hen.

Aik Family ne SHOLAY film dekhi.

Ghar aa ker Husband ne mazak me B.V se bola..
" Naaaach Basanti...!! "

Unka Beta Zor se chilaya...
"Basanti... Es Kutay ke samney mat Naachna..!!"

Teacher : Tell me the Ohm's Law ??

Student : I don't know full, i just know last part of it.

Teacher : OK....... tell me that part.

Student : Thiz iz called.....Ohm's Law. 

SILENCE
Is d best Answer
for all questions

SMILE
Is d best Reaction
in all situations

Unfortunately

BOTH Never Help In
any EXAM, VIVA, REVIEW & INTERVIEW :

Bachha:Teacher se....
Mam main kaicha dikhta hoo
Madam:Chhhhoooooo chhhweeettttt...
Bachha:(bazu wale ladke se)Dekha main nai kahta tha meko line marti hai

Once an angle came up 2 me & granted me a wish.

I asked 4 "world peace".

That's impossible, he said. 

Then I asked him 2 give u brains.

He said "Let me try world peace"

Boy: Ap apni Beti ki Shadi mere sath ker den, main ap ko ap ki beti ke wazan ke brabar sona don ga.



Meman : Mujy thora waqt do...!



Boy: sochney ke ley ?


Meman: Nhi, Beti ka wazan barhane ke ley.

Aik Pathan gehri soch mein....
.
.
.
Wife : Kya soch rahe ho ??
.
.
.
.
Pathan : Ye GEO walo ko kaisey pata chal jata hai ??
.
.
.
Wife: Kya ??
.
.
.
Pathan: Yehi keh.... Ap Dekh rahe hen "GEO Newz"....!!

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!

Husband: Today is sunday &
I have to enjoy it.

So i bought 3 movie tickets.

Wife: Why three?

Husband: 1 For U and 2 for ur parents.